Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

I love art so my blog page features an Edgar Degas art of the day. The painting above was the featured art of the day yesterday. It’s called “Woman in a Tub” and was painted by (one of my favorite artists) Edgar Degas in 1883.

What is your first thought when you see this picture? Mine was, “she’s a really beautiful lady.” Then I noticed something – she’s not a perfect size 2 body like I’m used to seeing on the cover of magazines. She has belly and hip fat just like I do. Her arms are not frail stems - they look like mine instead. In fact, she’s probably had a couple kids. There might be stretch marks on that belly of hers. Her boobs may even sag a little! She’s not a size 2, but perhaps a 12 or 14…like me! It’s funny how beauty standards have changed over the years.

My next thought was, “if I think she’s beautiful, then why do I hate what I see in the mirror???”. (Watch out girls, I’m about to be very transparent with you!) I’ve spent a lot of wasted time obsessing about my weight since having my second child. I’ve spent countless hours at the gym, been on at least three different diets, starved myself for a week, and have even taken diet pills. I finished a bottle of Hydroxycut right before it was pulled from the market. I do believe that I should continue to exercise and eat right to be healthy, however, the obsessive worrying and anxiety over my weight has been time well wasted (and probably counteractive!). So, I’ve decided not to worry any more. I’ll continue to work out, eat healthy and be active because those things are good for me - but, I’m tired of being unhappy with myself and I’m tired of hearing myself complain. So, I’ve decided to accept the size that I am today because today is all I have. Today is all we are promised. I have so many other things to be grateful for and happy about. Praise Jesus for the two kids who gave me stretch marks! I wouldn’t trade them for all the flat stomachs in the world! Not only that, but God has given me a husband who thinks I’m attractive just the way I am (well, he says he is so I gotta go with that)!

It’s funny how we’re our own worst judge. The bible says that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” and that God has a plan and a purpose for our lives. I wonder what would happen if we really believed that. What would we look like and sound like? What sort of people would we be? I’m determined to find out. The world says we need to change this, improve that, have this or get rid of that…but God looks at our hearts. And when Jesus lives in our hearts, then God says we’re beautiful! He loves us just they way we are because He made us.